But if I found that I grew worfe and worse,
I'd turn off Misaubin and take a nurse.
How oft when eminent phyficians fail,
Do good old women's remedies prevail !
When beauty's gone, and Chloe's ftruck with years,
Eyes she can couch, or she can fyringe ears.
Of graduates I diflike the learned rout,

And chufe a female doctor for the gout.

Thus would I live, with no dull pedants curs'd;
Sure, of all blockheads, fcholars are the worft.
Back to your universities, ye fools,

And dangle arguments on ftrings in fchools:
Those schools which Univerfities they call,
"Twere well for England were there none at all.
With ease that lofs the nation might sustain,
Supply'd by Goodman's-fields and Drury-lane.
Oxford and Cambridge are not worth one farthing,
Compar'd to Haymarket and Covent-garden :
Quit thofe, ye British youth, and follow these,
Turn players all, and take your 'fquire's degrees.
Boast not your incomes now, as heretofore,

Ye book-learn'd feats! the theatres have more:
Ye ftiff-rump'd heads of colleges be dumb;
A fingle eunuch gets a larger fum.

Have fome of you three hundred by the year;

Booth, Rich, and Cibber, twice three thousand clear.
Should Oxford to her fifter Cambridge join

A year's rack-rent, and arbitrary fine:

By BENJAMIN STILLINGFLEET",

Oderunt bilarem triftes, triftemque jocofi,
Sedatum celeres, agilem gnavumque remiffi.

T

HOR.

HE art of converfe, how to footh the foul
Of haughty man, his paffions to controul,
His pride at once to humble and to please,
And join the dignity of life with cafe,

Be

a Benjamin Stillingfleet, was the only fon of Edward Stillingfleet, a clergyman in the county of Norfolk, and grandfon to Dr. Stillingfleet, Bishop of Worcefter. He was educated at Norwich school, which he left in 1720, and went to Trinity College Cambridge, where Dr. Bentley, who had been private tutor to his father, was then Mafter, He became a candidate while there for a fellowship, but through the X 4 influence

Be now my theme.
Fram'd for this beft, this delicate command,
And taught, when lifping without reason's aid,
At the fame time to speak and to perfuade,
WYNDHAM, with diligence awhile attend,
Nor fcorn th' inftructions of an older friend;
Who when the world's great commerce fhall have join'd
The deep reflection, and the firength of mind,
To the bright talents of thy youthful ftate,
In turn fhall on thy better leffons wait.

O thou, whom Nature's hand

Whence comes it, that in every art we fee
Many can rife to a fupreme degree;

Yet in this art, for which all feem defign'd
By nature, fcarcely one compleat we find?
You'll fay, perhaps, we think, we fpeak, we move,
By the ftrong fprings alone of felfifh love:
Yet among all the fpecies, is there one,

Whom with more caution than qurfelves we fhun?

influence of Dr. Bentley, was rejected. On this difappointment, he quitted the Univerfity, and travelled with Mr. Wyndham of Felbrig, in Norfolk, to whom this Poem is addreffed, and with whom he lived in the most intimate and unreferved friendship. By the favour of the late Lord Barrington, he was appointed mafter of the barracks at Kenfington, a place which enabled him to purfue his ftudies, and particularly his favourite one of Natural Hiftory, with fuccefs. He was the author of feveral valuable works which have been publifhed, and of others which have not hitherto appeared. He died a batchelor, in the year 1771, at the of upwards of feventy years, and was buried in

age

Saint James's church.

What

What is it fills a puppet-fhow or court?
Go none but for the profit or the sport?
If fo, why comes each foul fatigu'd away,
And curfes the dull puppets fame dull play
Yet, unconvinc'd, is tempted ftill to go?
'Tis that we find at home our greatest foe.
And reafon good why folitude we flee;
Can wants with felf-fufficiency agree ?

Yet, fuch our inconfiftency of mind,
We court fociety, and hate mankind.
With fome we quarrel, for they're too fincere :
With others, for they're clofe, referv'd and queer;
This is too learn'd, too prudent, or too wife;
And that we for his ignorance defpife:

A voice perhaps our ear fhall harshly strike,
Then ftrait ey'n wit itself shall raise dislike ;
Our eye may by fome feature be annoy'd,
Behold at once a character deftroy'd :
One's fo good-natur'd, he's beyond all bearing,
He'll ridicule no friend, though out of hearing
Another warm'd with zeal, offends our eyes,
Because he holds the mirror up to vice.
No wonder then, fince fancies wild as thefe
Can move our spleen, that real faults difplease.
When Mævius, fpite of dulnefs, will be bright,

b

And teach ARGYLL to fpeak, and SWIFT to write

b John Duke of Argyll, equally celebrated as a fatesman, a warrior, and an orator. He died 3d September 1743.